Name:
Location: Toronto

Try me.

10 November, 2006

He knew. She knew. They knew. I don't news.

Over the past 2 weeks, I've been getting the feeling that everyone's beginning to believe I might be the female version of Michael Kelso. (For the uninitiated, there's Google.) There may be those of you who've had that opinion for a long time but you've just been wrong all this while. However, now, I wonder if "the people" (like they really matter!) might be right.

I've officially given up "The News". It's been a while since I've read a newspaper and I don't watch TV either. I do live on the Internet, but I don't waste my time hitting up news sites. So, in other words, I'm sort of cut off from world events.

Today, I was sitting on the couch, flipping channels to find something interesting to watch for 10 minutes while I relished my cold glass of pomegranate soda (somehow cold things taste so much better in the winter).

"...the Democrats have taken over the Senate..." - FLIP - "...and just a dab of rouge will help your beautiful cheekbones to pop out..." - FLIP - "...MOM! Milhouse is not my best frie..."

"Heyyyyyyyyy! Change it back!!!", screamed my roommate.
"What???? WHY? I don't want to watch the girl scream in glee over how beautiful her cheekbones now look!" replies I.
"Not that. I've already seen that episode. Flip it back to the news. They're talking about the Democrats' victory." whines my roommate.

Now here's what a penny would have gotten you at that point in time.
[Gosh. He's so slow. He reacts to everything 10 hours later. And he's already seen that episode? Geez. His "kind" puts me to shame! But I guess a Democrats victory is something his "kind" needs. Huh?? A Democrat victory? What victory????]

FLIP BACK. FLIP BACK.

"There was an election????"
Unfortunately, I said that out loud.
"Oh my goodness! You didn't know that?"
"Uhm... I don't really keep up with the news."
"What kind of lame excuse is that?"
"Uhm..."
"Well, the Democrats control Congress now."
"Yeah, I sort of gathered that."
"So, do you know that there's a storm heading towards Vancouver tonight?"
"Ohh! Really? Anything serious?"
"And do you know that Brad and Angelina are currently in India?"
"Wow."
"And do you know about the pastor who resigned?"
"Yeah."
"Okay, so you must have at least heard that Saddam's been given the death penalty, right?"
"?!?!?!"
Brain overload. Must sit down and take deep breath.

Okay, I lied. I didn't say that aloud. But I honestly did have no clue that there had been an election. So, had I admitted that out loud, the above conversation would have pretty much taken place. After all, the rest of the news bites mentioned above (which, I'd like to mention that if had been told to me all at once, would have followed that exact order of priority) were also told to me, courtesy: my so-up-to-date-with-current-affairs roommie. Except for the one about the pastor which I was tricked into reading online only because the headline had the words "sex" and "gay escort" in the same sentence. Enough said.

But yeah, as I was saying, I have cut myself off from the world. My friends probably watch the news but there are better things to do and talk about when we hang out. So, my only source of current affairs is The Dilbert Blog. In my opinion, if Scott doesn't blog about it, it's just not important! And about taking sides on issues, I stick with his. It's not like the media isn't biased, and I like him so much better than the media because he makes me laugh. So, since he hadn't really brought up the above issues, I was quite unaware. I guess now I understand why he was making all that fuss about the electronic voting machines.

Is it wrong of me? Am I being ignorant? I just don't care to read anymore about natural disasters and lousy politicians and wars and rapists or even miracle children and Oprah and China's booming economy. I honestly don't care. And I don't know why I don't care. Yes, it's depressing to hear about the horrible things happening to people (because some day that "people" could be me) and it's also depressing to hear about the great things happening to people (because I'll spend the rest of my time wondering why great things don't ever happen to me). Ohhhhhh. Eureka moment here. I don't care because it's depressing to care! Very well, then. That's the end of this post.





              
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